Education and The "Adult" Student

When do our children become true adults? Disregard the fact that you, the parent, may see your child as your little boy or girl forever. That is an emotional determination decided amongst each family, but has nothing to do with society or our legal system. Legally, your child becomes an adult when they are emancipated, reaching the age of suffrage, and have the full privileges and responsibilities of any American citizen. In our country, this happens at the age of 18 for the vast majority. Once an adult, parents are no longer responsible for the actions of their children, and accordingly they are no longer able to legally direct the actions of their children. They have been ‘freed’, now free to choose for themselves, and accept the consequences of those decisions. Parents continuing to attempt to exert control over their children does not change this legal threshold, despite what some parents may think. When they are 18, they are an adult, period, end of paragraph, end of chapter.

So now you have successfully raised your child to adulthood. They can make their own choices, live their own life, leave the nest, free to head out into the world and make their own way. You, the parent, are no longer legally responsible for their actions. However, every time your adult child submits an application for anything involving money, the recipient of the application is always interested in the parent’s financial status. Why is that? Rhetorical question.

There are 2 sides to this issue, one legal, and one business, and both questionable. The legal side is one of continued dependency, meaning this ‘adult’ has changed from a child dependent as a result of being under the age of suffrage, to an adult dependent with the rights of suffrage but wholly dependent upon another citizen for food and shelter. A special tax case for your own family members while they remain a student or until they reach the age of 21. During this dependency period, your adult child can be employed and you can continue to claim them as a dependent for tax purposes, and continue to maintain them as family members on your insurance. This sounds like someone is doing you and your child a favor, but in truth, any adult who is solely dependent upon you for support is a qualified dependent and entitles you to the same tax and insurance privileges. They don’t have to be your child, and the real benefit is questionable.

There are a myriad of financial alternatives for your adult child to pay for college, unless you are independently wealthy, which the majority of us are not. This is a country which professes higher standards of education, yet has yielded the responsibility of post-secondary education to business, even at our state universities. We pay more taxes for the minimal support we receive from our government than any other nation on the planet, and yet still have to pay for education. You can’t register your child for kindergarten without someone holding their hand out for payment. State universities, as with all public schools, are paid for with citizen tax dollars, and yet you are asked to pay additional fees from your post-tax dollars to use the privilege. Every citizen pays for the school system, yet only a smalle\rcentage actually recieve the education without additonal cost, and they continually deny access to legitimate applicants from within the state that funds them. It seems we easily forget that the state government and state educational system work for us, and we decide what they do and how they do it. The whole situation wreaks of financial mismanagement, and misuse of taxpayer dollars intended to fund education. An old story, but one that continues to pose questions, and no one is providing answers.

The issue of government financial mismanagement is a topic unto itself, and we can address that in a separate writing. The intent in bringing up the topic in relation to education was to remind the parents that they are already contributing to their child’s education every day, even after they become adults. Your tax burden actually increases when your children become adults, removing some of the 'benefit' of having less dependents to pay for. Higher education is part of the system you are funding with your tax dollars, and you are not getting what you pay for.

The point is that you raise your children to adulthood, send them off to start their adult lives with continuing education, and yet the system continues to reach into your pocket. It is not because it is right, or legal, it is because you are a better source of money and allowing your adult children a reduced cost education wouldn’t feed the real motive. If state universities were trying to break even, they wouldn’t be funding additional programs and facilities, they couldn’t. They wouldn’t be giving free education to special interest groups either, instead they would be offering reduced tuition to all citizens equally based upon residence requirements. However, they do continue to spend above and beyond basic operational costs without additional state funding, so how do they make up for the additional cost? The student body is composed of young adults without any real earning potential, so they need to get the money somewhere. That’s where you, the parent, come in.

You have no legal obligation to provide any funding, in fact the school – or more accurately the state you fund with your tax dollars, has that obligation. However, as long as you are listing your children as dependents, they can assert that you are assuming their full financial obligations, and keep a hand in your pocket. Your best bet is to stop carrying your children as dependents after the age of 18. Both they, and you, will realize more benefit when they apply for scholarships, grants, and subsidies on their own, without your parental income being considered. Don’t continue to provide additional funds to a system you are already funding through your tax dollars. Resident tuition can be covered by scholarships and grants much easier if your income is not accounted for.

If you want your children to be able to stay at home, have them pay you a small amount of rent to cover their costs, then they are not dependent upon you – at least not legally. You are also able to legally give your money to whomever you choose, and are also entitled to give limited financial gifts to your children without tax consequence. Explore your legal options, tax options, and education options in full. Get the best education for your money, and have your children take advantage of the benefits of citizenry and higher education without reaching into your pocket. If you are a tax paying citizen, remember that someone will get the money from scholarships, grants, and reduced residential tuition that American citizens and businesses fund, so I say you should make sure its someone deserving, like your own children.

What is your opinion?